I chased the girl I liked, and kept silently giving without asking for her return. In the end, I suddenly found that not only did I not chase her, but I was also used as a backup by her. What should I do in this situation?
No one wants to be someone's backup, everyone wants to be the protagonist of love. If we want to get rid of our backup status and become a real boyfriend, we need to start from the following aspects:
1. Accept Reality, change the mentality
When we find that we have inadvertently become a girl’s backup, it is unwise to rush to prove to the girl that we are not wise. The excuse at this time is like a mental patient saying in a mental hospital that he has no No one will believe it if you are sick, so you must quickly change your mindset, accept your current positioning, and then control the frequency and quality of contact.
Use the role of backup to communicate with girls, respect social rules and objective facts, and seize limited opportunities to show your true level.
2. Abandon the past and establish a new impression
The reason why the spare tire cannot be turned into a regular employee is because the other party understands You know everything. She knows your shortcomings, knows your strengths, and understands you completely, so she has lost interest in you, so you need to develop new abilities to demonstrate renewed attraction.
Now that information is so developed, as long as we are willing to spend a certain amount of time learning a new thing, we can roughly understand and master it. Then show your changes in an appropriate way, and the other person will be surprised by it. As long as we can successfully attract each other's attention, we have taken the first step to success.
3. Balance the social status of both parties
Generally speaking, beautiful girls are proud and have no shortage of suitors around them. If you confess your love to a girl, you will be no different from other suitors and will only be eliminated. At this time, if you show a sense of no need to the girl, it is a disguised release of value to the girl, and her attention will be focused on you.
4. Confess affectionately and face it calmly
If you do the above, the other party will definitely understand what you mean. But I will definitely not reply to you. Because she thinks you like her and is already convinced about you. No matter how bad she treats you, you will never leave. So, you need to take the final step to break her fantasy. Find a late night, tell her that you like her very much and want to be with her, but you don't want to accept this ambiguous state, and let her weigh the pros and cons and make a choice. No matter what the outcome is, you should treat it calmly.
In fact, being a spare tire is not terrible, because at least it shows that you are still within the consideration range of girls. At this time, just maintain your attitude, control your sense of need, and convey your values ????and charm to the girl, so that she can see a different you and be prepared.There is also a high chance that the tire will be corrected.
